Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Lessons Learned


Having a mentee in my life has been quite the experience, let me tell you. It has taught me so much about self-worth! It has made me realize how important recognition is and about how wonderful and effective constant encouragement can be. All these things aside, it's also tough. I had a vision of what being a mentor would be like before I got myself into the program. Here is what it looked like: Me, a supportive and sassy adult who can just be real with a teen who's about to emerge into the "real" world. Her: a young, excitable, and ever-curious bundle of life-energy in need of a little guidance. We would spend our time hiking or kicking around a soccer ball...a rootbeer float here, a friendship necklace there...you get the picture.

So far, it has not been like that. She is not like that. We are not like that (yet). She is obviously in this program for a reason and sadly enough, it's because she lacks anything even remotely close to my daydream scenario; and that is where I come in, I suppose. The truth is she lacks a lot and she needs me to make up for that...and well, that is intense and amazing, but mostly intense.

The reality finally hit me. This is really about two very different people learning to know each other and frankly, learning to like each other. It's a crash course in trust and growth and all in all, it is pretty fantastic. It's funny to see us fumble along trying to understand this process. And what a process it is! Once we figure out our relationship, I think we be able to really see each other, but it will undoubtably be a challenge. However, as with most volunteer work, it has been eye-opening and that is why I love it. But, man, oh man, it's not easy.

I must say that being the positive force in someone else's life is pretty rewarding. Offering chances, ideas, and experiences to someone who wouldn't otherwise be exposed to those things is like being Santa, only better. That is precisely what makes this so very worth it.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

very interesting how often we enter relationships with one expectation, assuming the other shares those expectaions, only to find out they don't and then spending a lot of time figuring out what to do or how to get out.

How can we prevent such social disasters? We maybe we should not just wait for experience and then adapt...thats how animals learn... maybe we have tools that will accelerate the eperiential and learning process...

maybe that is our faculty to reason, to conceptuize thought and most important to discuss them with others. Maybe a reasoned dialogue (talk) will allow two or more minds to come to a better understanding of expectations and thus better relations and better life...maybe the Good Life...as understood by sharing our thoughts..

how much more intimate can one get...? It is tough stuff...but whever promised you human life would be easy?